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The Tarot Corner

3rd Week of July 2008 Daily Summaries

All Summaries Written and Copyrighted by
(unless otherwise indicated)

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July 14, 2008
Finally Solved a Case!

As the storm rages outside, Jua-melia grumbles over being stuck in the basement and wishes "all those brides" would go home for their beauty sleep. That way they'll look gorgeous when her bomb blows them to smithereens. Henchy is also anxious to leave, but insists they must keep a low profile so no one gets suspicious. Jua-melia responds with a classic "I want my revenge" temper tantrum. Then, sure something has gone horribly wrong, she insists on going upstairs.

Esme and Tabby rush into the church and Esme cheers that they've arrived to save everyone. "You're too late," Vincent smiles and they see everyone splayed out dead. Even Tabby grabs herself in horror, while the V's pat themselves on the back. "You can never leave me now Aunt Esme," Viki laughs happily and Vincent's thrilled his parents are dead. "Doesn't everyone look so peaceful?" he asks, and the two crazies give into mad, uncontrollable laughter. Esme grimaces at Viki and then names off all the deceased -- or all the male deceased. When Tabby notices women weren't spared, Esme cries over her best friend Fancy. Tabby figures she's too late and turns to run from the church, but Esme is sure the witch can still save them. "This old battleaxe ain't no doctor," Vincent chuckles, which only riles Tabby up. After Tabby slams Vincent for being a "blue ribbon winner of the genetic mutation society," Esme reminds her of her promise to Endora and offers this as a chance to redeem herself. Tabby can't imagine why she needs redemption. "Epics and eras of evil count for nothing?" Esme gasps and keeps begging, but Tabby can't reanimate corpses, especially with death coming anyway. "It would be a waste of time!" she argues.

Then the ground starts shaking. "First an electrical storm. Now an earthquake. What sort of town is this?" Henchy cries downstairs, crossing himself. Upstairs, Tabby explains to Esme that her evil presence in the church has the dark side battling the light. "My presence here is wreaking havoc with the fabric of time and space. The very pillars of reality are trembling!" Esme demands she save everyone quick, but Tabby reveals the situation has escalated to universal proportions. Desperate, Esme suggests Tabby pray and Tabby comes up with a plan. "Darkness was mine, but darkness exists not without light. Bring this mortal back from the darkness," she spells, as she drops a potion on each of the dead. Viki and Esme think it's funny and Viki wishes they'd taped the whole episode. While Tabby works, Esme rails against them, saying she hopes Sam wakes and carts them off to jail. Viki is horrified, but Esme only says, "You have gone way too far."

As Tabby finishes, a shot of lighting from the cross hits her. With a quick word to her daughter, she offers herself to her greatest enemy. "Please, God, hear my prayer," she stumbles. "As a preacher of darkness, I ask for the greatest gift of all. The gift of life, for these innocent people," she begs, offering to sacrifice her powers in return. Then she raises her arms and chants, "Save the innocent: Take my powers." Lightening flies, connecting her to the dead bodies. Viki asks what's happening, so Esme tells her and Vincent to take cover, but then the shaking stops. "Now that's what I call an antidote," Esme sighs.

Julian's coughs call Esme over and Eve stirs seconds later. They're confused about why they're not dead, so Esme lets them believe they were just unconscious. They recall how the V's tried to poison everyone and Esme announces that Tabby saved them all. Of course, unsure of how to explain that, she has to backtrack. Nearby, Paloma, Noah, Ivy and Gwen wake. Ivy is relieved when Sam wakes soon after. Julian and Eve catch them up on the V's attack, but don't have an explanation for why they survived.

Sheridan crawls to Luis as he and Fancy come to thinking it was all a dream. Sheridan watches as the couple comforts each other. After Ivy brings them water, Luis thanks Sheridan for saving Fancy. She insists she did it for him, adding she's no hero, since nothing she did actually worked. Luis says moments like this make men realize what's important. Sheridan misunderstands, sure he's realized she's the one, but he concludes, "Your friendship means everything to me!" It's like a punch to the gut, even as he talks of how he can count on her. "You're going to be in our lives forever," he says and Sheridan forces a smile, but is saved from the awkward and painful moment when Sam calls Luis to help him arrest the V's.

Gwen finds Gert-resa sprawled over Ethan, but is too confused and focused on why they're all alive to get mad at the pairing. "You've been poisoned so many times and you've managed to survived," Gwen marvels, and Ethan says he was sure he'd died. When they decide to start cleaning for the ceremony, Gert-resa is surprised they're not going to postpone it. Gwen, back to herself, lets Gert-resa know that's not going to happen. "The quadruple wedding is on," Gwen smiles, but then Ethan flashes back to what we had assumed was Theresa's mid-poisoning fantasy about Ethan figuring out who she really is. It turns out she was talking out loud, because he remembers it and says, "You're not Gert-trude, your Theresa." He's so sure, he goes to pull off her wig, but Gert-resa backs away, denying it and pushing his hands away. He ultimately believes her, because, "she wouldn't play this kind of a trick on me and if she were here right now and she was alive, she would find a way to be with me." She wishes she could tell him the truth.

Jua-melia joins the group, now dressed as a nun, and offers Pilar, Paloma and Noah water and bandages. As they pass the water around, Paloma wonders how the earthquake will affect their wedding. Noah's sure they'll just have to straighten the church up and Juanita chuckles to herself that she'll see it cleaned up and ready for the weddings before letting her plan fall apart. When she later questions Paloma and Noah, Pilar asks if she knows her. Juanita keeps her head turned and demurs she's new to the parish. "I hope we become good friends," Paloma says, before thanking her and leaving.

Esme realizes Tabby has disappeared and then finds the witch pinned to the wall next to the cross, her body splayed as if on its own cross. She insists Tabby must not be dead. "You're supposed to be rewarded, not punished," she cries. When she puts her hands together and begs for her to be alive, Tabby gasps and opens her eyes. "I feel awful," she says, as she brings her arms down to her side. Esme recaps her heroism, but Tabby is just heartbroken over losing her powers. "Without my powers, I don't even know who I am anymore," she sighs, so Esme helps her off the wall. Then she tries a bit of magic and successfully zaps herself and her clothes back to normal. Esme is thrilled and tells her to try something else. Tabby tries to pop up a Martimmy, but it's a no go. "I'm not a witch," she says, totally disconsolate. Esme insists she should be proud of her heroism, but Tabby guffaws that most of the locals didn't even deserve to be saved. Esme feels guilty about Tabby's pain and wants to do something to help her. She even suggests everyone should know what she did for them, but Tabby doesn't want the attention, for Endora's sake. She sighs that her act of kindness may not earn kindness in return. "Mortals are always afraid of anything they don't understand," she says, before setting off home to "figure out a way how to raise a witch... when I'm no longer a witch myself."

Esme joins Sam, Luis and Ivy as they stroll over and arrest Viki and Vincent for attempting to murder all the guests. Eve and Julian follow, but then Esme interrupts Sam's arrest, telling Viki to fess up to everything. Viki plays dumb and then references Esme's drug use, so no one will believe her, but Esme still lists off all Viki's murders and attacks. Luis says he knew it, but Sam is just relieved. "Finally solved a case," he sighs. Then he notes they've actually solved all the open murder cases. When Ivy marvels at Viki's seeming innocence, a cuffed Viki loses it and runs at her, crying, "You tried to send me away from my Aunt Esme: I tried to send you to hell!" Sam holds her back, telling the wacko to "breathe in; breathe out" and calm it down. Vincent chimes in to ask where "that creepy old witch" is, revealing she's the one who undid their plan. He explains it accurately and clearly, with Viki backing him up and saying Esme will too. Julian prays Esme will keep her mouth shut and out loud, calls the whole story a "bizarre idea." Esme plays right along with Julian, so Luis determines the pair is setting up their insanity defense. The duo tries to convince them it's the truth, but even Esme rolls her eyes at them. As Sam and Luis drag them away, Vincent promises his parents, "I'll be back when you least expect it. I'll be the last thing you ever see!" Eve turns to Julian, crushed over the hate coursing through their son, but Julian says it's not her fault. "He's off his rocker," he shrugs.

A dejected Tabby returns home, where Endora is thrilled her mommy saved the day. "Now we can leave," Tabby reminds her, but Endora reveals she can't make herself rematerialize. With no powers to help her daughter, Tabby starts to panic and lecture. Endora's sure she'll figure it out, eventually, but Tabby is more upset by the idea that she can't help than the fact that Endora's stuck. "I can't even hug you," she cries, so Endora makes herself a teddy bear, "perfect for hugging." When she tears up over living without her powers, Endora says they still have each other and love. She adds that they can do anything together and asks her mother to repeat it. "I believe together we can do anything," Tabby repeats.

Back in the church basement, Henchy puts the last touches on the bomb and activates the 60 minute countdown. Upstairs, Pilar finds that Paloma and Noah have gotten the church cleaned up and ready for the weddings. "A bad dress rehearsal means you'll have a wonderful opening night," Pilar notes, but after she waxes on about the joy and hope of "tomorrow", she spies Gert-resa watching Gwen and Ethan. She checks on her daughter, who's overheard her and says she's not feeling that joy and hope. Once Ethan renews his vows, she insists, "I'll never be his wife. I'll never feel joy again. Tomorrow's going to come for everyone but me"

Tuesday, July 15
What Could be a Worse Omen?

Tabby needs her cup of morning coffee. Unfortunately, nothing happens when she goes to zap it up. "Oh my magic!" she recalls and then flashes back to sacrificing her powers. "And for what? To bring those mewling mortals back to life," she groans, collapsing into her chair. Kay bounces into the room, thrilled it's her wedding day, but Tabby can't crack a smile and immediately shares her troubles with Kay. "I strayed from the path of wickedness into the thorns and brambles of goodness," she cries, blaming it on Esme and Endora. When she freaks out again over not being able to make coffee, Kay zaps some up and asks her to backtrack. As Tabby outlines Viki and Vincent's mushroom murder and mayhem, Kay looks horrified, but she's distracted when she hears Julian is Tabby's baby daddy. Then she hears Tabby was talked into entering the church and she nearly jumps out of her chair. Once she hears Tabby saved everyone, she does jump and hugs her, calling her "the most beautiful, fabulous, big-hearted witch". Dejected Tabby is quick to point out she's no longer a witch. Kay is impressed that she sacrificed and saved everyone, but Tabby can't stop grumbling about her situation. "I'm no one! I'm less than you," she cries, but Kay wants to tell everyone about Tabby's heroism and her ex-witch status. Tabby recalls how Harmony used to kill witches and refuses to subject her or her daughter to that torture. Even worse, the truth might bring people by asking favors. "I won't ever tell anyone," Tabitha concludes, demanding Kay keep her sacrifice a secret. "Come off it," Kay says, but then a returned Fluffy knocks the ex-witch out of her chair. She's happy to see him, but he seems to be after her. She begs Fluffy to remember her, but he doesn't!     "I haven't just lost my powers. I've lost my whole identity!" Tabby gasps. Chipper Kay tells her to look on the bright side: now she can go to the wedding! "Oh joy. Rapture," Tabby says, unconvincingly. Then she recalls the black, exploding wedding cake in the Book of Disasters and all the bad wedding signs she's gotten of late. She tries to back out, but Kay coos, bounces and calls Tabby her best friend. Tabitha is touched, but when Kay runs up to change, she calls for Endora and says they have to "high tail it out of here immediately." Endora doesn't want to leave until after the wedding, but Tabitha is sure something bad is going to happen at it. "I've got a terrible feeling that everyone's going to die," she foretells.

Pilar serves up breakfast just as her boys walk in. Miguel's already full of butterflies, but she's sure juevos rancheros will do the trick. She's happy with her sons' choices in women, though she says she found them. Miguel toasts the brides, Luis adds their mother in law (ie Pilar) and then Pilar says, "Let's make it to love." Miguel sighs that nothing could spoil their beautiful day, not knowing there's an activated bomb awaiting them in church. When they sit down to breakfast, the boys talk wedding, but Pilar gets teary and quiet. They push until she says she's impressed with how loving they are together, which makes them bicker a bit. Then she admits she was really worrying over Juanita. "Here we go," Luis says, and indeed, Pilar goes into a Juanita spiral. "Not on our wedding day," Luis pronounces, but Pilar can't think of a better day for Juanita's revenge. "She's closer than we think," she warns, but the guys beg her not to ruin their wedding with Juanita talk, especially since they've agreed to leave town. She wants to head out straight from the wedding, but Luis and Miguel won't skip the reception. After they give her a lecture and thank her for the meal, Luis quips, "Come on Miguel. We got to get dressed for our execution." Left alone, Pilar decides to be positive, as her boys requested. Then a black crow flies into her back door. "What could be a worse omen," she wonders.

Before heading out to church, the boys sneak back into the kitchen for seconds and brother bonding. Migs thanks his brother for giving up his dreams after Antonio and Papa left, admitting(,) "You've been more like a father and a role model." Luis tries to shrug it off, saying he did what he had to do, but appreciates the recognition. When Miguel asks if he has any regrets, his big bro says things happen as they were meant to, though he does(,) he plans on going to college down the road - to set a good example for his kids. Then he congratulates Miguel on finally getting it right with Kay, teasing him for how long it took him to realize Kay was more than a friend. Miguel recalls how hard he'd fallen for Charity, chasing her around the world when his "baseball buddy" was the woman for him. "People who are meant to be together always end up together," Luis says, which makes Migs think of Theresa. They wish she was there, "Ordering everyone around, trying to make sure her ceremony to Ethan came first in the line up." Miguel says it's tragic she never got her happy ending, but Luis figures she's happy and watching from above with Antonio. "Let's hope she doesn't throw down a thunder bolt at Gwen," Miguel says and they laugh, sure Theresa would if she could. As Luis says she'll be there in spirit, Pilar walks in, ordering them not to eat in their suits. She waxes on about them finding "true love" and then gives them marital advice on compromising, not holding things in, listening and trying to see things from their ladies' points of view. They tease her for being "the wisest woman in Harmony" and thank her for teaching them about family and values, following their hearts and believing that people are more important than things. Pilar tears up, but Luis only wants to see her laugh. When he tells her "what ever you want," she reverts back to her Juanita terrors and begs them to leave right after the ceremony. Her sons finally give in, agreeing to leave that day, but after the reception. Then she gets out a camera for a picture of the boys. Very pretty, of course!

Gert-resa prepares to plant her letter begging Ethan to not marry Gwen, but Gwen walks it before she gets anywhere. She grabs "the letter from the dead" and calls Gert-resa on being Theresa. Theresa pulls out her teeth and goes at Gwen, skewering her for going too far this time, putting innocent people in danger and causing them death. Gwen just marvels at Theresa's ability to cheat death and then points a gun at her. "This time Theresa, I'm not taking any chances," she says, going on to say she should have killed her long ago, instead of fighting her. She shoots and when Theresa goes down, she cheers, "This time, Theresa, you're going to stay dead." She smiles a satisfied smile at herself in the mirror, but then Theresa shows up beside her. "It's going to take a lot more than you to get rid of me," she promises, noting that alive or dead, she has Ethan's love.

Gwen wakes from her nightmare with a scream and realizes she must take matters into her own hands. She walks into Gert-resa's room and rails at the motionless form in the bed, sure Theresa is faking sleep. She threatens Theresa with death if anything goes wrong with the wedding. She can't bring herself to kill Theresa now, since her nemesis saved Ethan, but she considers herself the winner. "I end up with Ethan and you end up with nothing," she smiles. She doesn't even care that Theresa isn't answering. After she recounts Theresa's current situation yet again, she promises, "At the first hint that you are trying to get Ethan back, all bets are off and I call Juanita." If it means keeping Ethan, she's willing to live with the entire family's blood on her hands. "If you're lucky, maybe you'll catch my bouquet," she says as she leaves, but when Theresa stirs, she has ear plugs in! Even though she hasn't heard anything, she wonders, "Why does it feel like somebody just walked over my grave?" Meanwhile, the bomb counts down.

Wednesday, July 16
Let's get you Hitched

Tabby reads the headline "Freak Electrical Storm Ravages Harmony". She's more upset about what was really happening - the loss of her powers, but Kay comes down in her wedding dress to distract her. Tabby has to admit she's a beauty, but after they coo over how lucky Kay is, she tries to back out of coming. Before she can get it out, however, Sam comes in and spins his daughter bride around. Kay hopes they're half as happy as her parents were, which leads to an apology for her part in destroying their marriage. "We all make mistakes," he says. "What matters is we learn from them." They hug it out and then Kay wishes her sister were there. Sam smiles knowingly and Jessica comes running in! Unfortunately, Jessica can't stay for the wedding, as weddings are a no no in rehab. "All that booze, and all that family drama," she shrugs, promising to return once the sobriety's stuck. She raves over baby Sam and then reveals she's going back to college and dating Reese again.

Left alone with Tabby, Sam marvels over the events of the night before. Then he tells her Viki and Vincent claim she's a witch and brought everyone back to life. "I can honestly say, Sam, I'm not a witch," she says and he believes her. After a neighborly kiss, they return to the girls and he tells them their mother is watching them from above. Then he gives Kay an envelope from Simone, who's still in New Orleans with the other MIA Russells. She apologizes for missing the big day, but explains she's busy being a good aunty and daughter. She's also sent diamond earrings for Kay's "something new". Jessica can't help remembering how Simone and Paloma helped her break free of Spike. Kay is just thrilled at how great rehab looks on her sister, but has to get to the church. They hug it out and then Sam has to take his youngest back to rehab, leaving Tabby to her task of backing out of the wedding. An emotional Kay urges her to come, so she says, "We'll see." Then she gives her something old and borrowed the bracelet Cleopatra gave Tabby on her own wedding day. "I've been married dozens of times," she reveals, but she's "always cherished this bracelet as I've cherished you." After they exchange I love yous, Tabby sends her off to the church and sighs, "Unless some miracles happens, this is the last day of everyone's life in Harmony."

Endora comes downstairs rematerialized, but as a teenager. Tabby tells her to zap back to childhood, but it doesn't work. Tabby isn't surprised and suspects Endora may be losing some of her powers simply because Tabby has. Then she tells her daughter that teen or toddler, she's still going to make her leave town. Endora pouts that she wants to go to the wedding, insisting that after the rehearsal nightmare, "What else could go wrong?" Tabby is certain her daughter's been around long enough to know better than to ask that! Plus, she has a bad feeling. "These four weddings are going to signal the beginning of the end," she says, but Endora begs and then just goes ahead and zaps them to the church - and zaps Tabby into a light pink number, replete with boa and sparkling headband! Tabby grumbles about leaving town, but then Sam shows up with Kay, wondering how the ex-witch beat them to the church, especially as she's in a whole new outfit. After she introduces Endora as her "great niece Doreen," Sam leaves them to check on Noah. Kay is thrilled to have her girls there and is sure they'll all live happily ever after, but Tabby can't forget the prophecy.

Nun Juanita is hiding out at the church, chuckling to herself over her ticking bomb. She's so pleased, she decides to call the woman who led her to the Lopez Fitzgerald's to begin with - Gwen! That bride to be is having breakfast with Ethan. He worries they're temping luck by seeing each other on their day, but she shrugs that after surviving the poisoning, she feels immune to tragedy. When her cell phone rings, she asks Gert-resa to get it. Juanita is annoyed that this Gert-resa person answers the phone and orders her to put Gwen on. Gert-resa recognizes her voice, but can't place it, so she passes the phone to Gwen. When Gwen hears Juanita's voice, she nervously moves into the hallway for privacy. She does not like hearing that Juanita knows about the quad wedding and even worse, says she's on her way, but won't explain. "I'm sure it will be a real blast," she says of her big surprise. Gwen returns to the room completely freaked, but tells Ethan and Gert-resa it was her mother, who's running late. When she sends Gertie to check on the kids, Ethan says they should give Gertie a raise. Gwen wants to talk honeymoon and suggests they leave right after the ceremony. Ethan balks, wanting to spend time with the kids, but she pushes. "I want the truth. What's going on?" he asks, but she just babbles about romance and offers to make him "happy" so he agrees. When Gert-resa returns, Gwen goes to get ready, but not before reminding Gertie to heed her warning from this morning. Gert-resa gets the message that she better not interrupt the wedding, but of course never heard Gwen's first warning.

Miserable, Gert-resa turns to leave, but Ethan stops her to thank her and share a secret with her. "When I was affected by the poison, I saw a woman watching over me," he says, going on to describe his vision of Theresa. "She was there, Gertrude," he says. Gert-resa argues it, but he insists he knows what he felt. Then he backtracks, admitting it could have been a hallucination from the poison. "I wish I could hold her," he sighs and she tells him she's sure Theresa would do anything to be with him, while thinking that she just can't take the chance. Before anymore can be said, Gwen gushes back in with news that the limo has arrived. She's got their wedding and honeymoon gear on board and suggests they get ready at the church. Gert-resa is surprised to hear Gwen and Ethan are leaving, but Gwen just rushes them to the church.

Luis, Pilar and Migs arrive at the church to find it decked out with flowers, a surprise since the roads are still closed. Pilar excuses herself to check that the bouquets are in the brides' room, but then Miguel notices the white runner is missing from the aisle, so she sets out to take care of that instead. Her boys follow her down to the basement, where Pilar orders Luis to be careful, but she's just worried he'll ruin his suit. "You sound like there's a bomb in here," he guffaws, not knowing that of course there is. The door they need is locked, so they set out to find a key. While they're gone, Juanita walks into the basement looking for Henchy and Pilar spots her. "If Pilar recognizes me, I'm going to have to kill her now," she thinks. Pilar wants her to unlock the door, but with the bomb on the other side, Juanita tells her she doesn't have the key and no one else is around. After Pilar realizes she's the nun from yesterday and again asks if they don't know each other, Miguel returns with the key. Juanita mutters that they must not find the bomb and goes on until Luis shows up, having found the white runner upstairs. The troop heads back up, the door never opened, leaving Juanita to mutter about revenge.

With the runner situation handled, Migs wants to go visit his bride. Luis scoffs at the idea, saying he'll freak Kay out and that it's bad luck. After Miguel talks of loving Kay (even though she's a witch), he asks Luis if he loves Fancy more than he loved Sheridan. Luis shrugs that it's different and Miguel agrees that's how it is with Kay and Charity. When their mom returns with a note from Kay, Miguel writes one to send back. Pilar lets them know Fancy should be around soon, while Paloma is still at the hair dresser. Luis marvels at three family members marrying in one day, which leads him to wish Theresa was with them. "That would be some foursome," he sighs.

Gert-resa shows up at the church, lugging Gwen's dress. "It's like carrying my own rope to my own hanging," she grumbles. She wishes she could think of a way to bungle the ceremony without getting caught, but is at a loss. Then Ethan shows up in his tux, but he doesn't look ready to get married. He's gone back to the place he thought he'd seen Theresa, but couldn't feel her presence anymore. He again shrugs it must be the poison playing tricks, but Gert-resa asks if he means that. He doesn't know what he believes, except that he's lost the love of his life and what he feels for Gwen is "not the same." He chokes back tears and walks off, to be replaced by Pilar, who suggests Theresa leave after her siblings get married and before Gwen and Ethan's turn. "It's just a lot," she says and Gert-resa agrees.

When the boys take their places at the altar, Luis' phone rings. Migs tells him to turn it off, but there's a text from Sheridan saying he shouldn't marry Fancy. Luis ignores it. At the other end of the aisle, Kay makes peace with her father over Ivy and then the music starts. "Now let's get you hitched," he says and leads her toward Miguel, while Juanita lovingly caresses her "little wedding gift." She wishes she could be around for the big bang, but knows she must head out to a safe distance. "This is really it," she exhales, tasting her coming revenge. Miguel takes Kay's hand, as the clock ticks down.

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