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The Tarot Corner

2nd Week of June 2008 Daily Summaries

All Summaries Written and Copyrighted by
(unless otherwise indicated)

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June 9, 2008
I Learned from the Best

At the manse, Little E calls Gert-resa, Ethan and Gwen down to the living room, where he's set up a special surprise. With Ethan and Gwen gearing up for their recommitment ceremony, he wants to celebrate with "dinner and a show." When Ethan notes they're going to adopt him too, Gert-resa thinks to herself that Gwen will never be his mother. Then she tearfully asks Little E how he could help Gwen and Ethan celebrate, knowing the ceremony will break her heart. Gwen is impressed to hear he's even set up a bar, but Little E shrugs Julian taught him long ago. He can't, however, make drinks, because during his lessons with Beccs, she always took the bottles and downed them straight. As Ethan pours wine, Gert-resa pulls Little E aside for more chest clutching over his betrayal. She tells him that even Pilar gave Ethan and Gwen her blessing and dissolves into babbling over her fate until Little E tells her to shut up and listen. "If you'll just have a little patience, you'll see. I did it for you," he promises. "You won't be disappointed."

Gwen is also wondering after Little E's change in tact and is curious about what kind of show she should expect. Ethan respects her suspicion, but is hopeful it's "the beginning of a whole new relationship." Gwen doesn't have much hope and rightly so! Little E turns his attention back to them and asks them to sit to the meal he ordered from the cooks, which is composed of all Gert-resa's faves, from prosciutto and melon to chicken mole. Ethan gets it, but not Gwen, so he doesn't say anything. Little E pointedly asks Gwen if she isn't going to say grace and Gert-resa agrees they should, so she lets Little E do it. The delicious meal is doing well to win Gwen over, while also keeping Theresa on Ethan's mind. Then it's time for the "main event," before coffee and dessert. Little E says how much Ethan means to him and sends them to the couch for his presentation. Gert-resa is nervously excited. Little E presses some buttons on his computer and Gwen straightens up when it plays Ethan's song with Theresa. "True Love" the text on the TV says, followed by a slideshow of Ethan and Theresa photos. Gert-resa is on cloud nine. Gwen can't imagine why she should sit through this, but (without ever taking his eyes from the screen) Ethan insists she must support her stepson-to-be. He sighs in his head for his true love, but then Gwen gets up, turns it off and calls Little E a brat! Gert-resa says there's no need for names and Little E apologizes, but Gwen just rolls her eyes and says he's not "half as sorry" as he's going to be. She accuses the kid of trying to get Ethan to back out of the ceremony, but Gert-resa assures her he has no hidden agenda and Ethan accuses her of sounding like a "fish wife." Little E apologizes again and says this was just the start of the show. "You and Uncle Ethan are next," he says, going on to explain, "Ever since I can remember, you, Uncle Ethan and mom, you were all around." He claims he was trying to be accurate to history, so Gwen asks if there really are pics of her too. Ethan says he doesn't like the way she's treating Little E, but she counters she doesn't like the way Little E is treating her by putting on "one big giant Ethan and Theresa love fest". She asks to see one pic of her and Little E balks that she unplugged the TV, so he doesn’t know if he can get it working again. She shrugs that he's lying, which both Gert-resa and Ethan jump at. She reminds them he turned her blue and then goes to check the pics herself.

After Little E tells her not to touch his computer, Gert-resa and Ethan both whisper to him, fearing he's about to "get busted". Little E asks whether she'll try to send him to boarding school again, which Gert-resa says will never happen. Just as Gwen asks him if his intent was to make her feel bad, the words "Ethan & Gwen" appear on the screen and Gwen has to eat her own words, especially after Little E explained how hard it was to get all the pics from the country club, her friends and her mom. When he reveals he had to search Becc's computer, Gert-resa worries of the x-rated stuff, but Little E promises he didn't see any. Then he apologizes, explaining every time he tries to make Gwen happy, it blows up in his face and worse, "every time I try to get close to you, you always pull away and tell me to go play with my sister." He wonders if she's a bad mom, but Ethan says she's great with Jonathan, so Little E figures she's only good with her own kids. An emotional Gwen apologizes up and down for her short fuse and thanks him for the slide show. As they move back to the table for dessert, Gert-resa pats her son on the back. "I learned from the best," he smiles. "Aunt Gwen, she's pretty, but not when she's mad and Uncle Ethan doesn't like that."

When Ethan and Little E leave the table, Gwen admits to Gertie that she doesn't know what to make of Little E. Gert-resa says he's wonderful and Gwen says, "Until tonight, I wouldn't have thought so." But then again, she's still not convinced. She can't help thinking that "little monster" planned the night to go this way, with her losing her temper, especially considering his mother Theresa was "the most conniving, vicious little shrew." Gert-resa insists he's just a child. "Yeah, a child of the devil!" Gwen scoffs, now convinced she's played right into Little E's game. Gert-resa then uses a spiral napkin ring to connect Gwen's lace top to the lace tablecloth, before getting up from the table. Little E returns to his seat while Gert-resa suggests Ethan offer Gwen a dance, since his fiancée is likely feeling guilty over her blow up. Ethan calls Gertie a "breath of fresh air" and follows her advice. A touched Gwen stands at the invite, pulling the tablecloth and all Little E's fixings down on top of her. Ethan helps her up and she immediately turns on Little E, saying, "I wonder how this happened?" Ethan insists it was an accident and all three can't help laughing as Gwen storms off to shower.

Across the manse, Pilar charges into Fancy's room, hoping for good news about the attempts to convince Luis and Miguel to leave without telling them about Juanita. Just as Fancy finally gets a word in, the boys enter and announce they're in for the family trip around the world. A tearful Pilar embraces them in relief. She says there's no itinerary, for the sake of fun, but it's really so Juanita can't find them. When the guys say they have calls to make, she worries, but they say they're just stopping the mail, newspaper, etc. Pilar thanks Fancy, who lets her believe the guys agreed to go without ever hearing the truth about why. Pilar wants to move fast, but Fancy begs her to take a second to smile, explaining "All this doom and gloom is scaring me." She shivers over Pilar's descriptions of Juanita, but Pilar only warns, "That woman is far worse than your grandfather was, in many ways." Fancy understands, but says then there should be some relief in planning this escape, not to mention excitement over the trip itself. "Stop worrying about Juanita for just a minute," she begs and gets a few half smiles out of Pilar. When Fancy slips and says all the kids will be together, she feels guilty for bringing up "dead" Theresa (but doesn't note Pilar's OTHER dead kid). Pilar admits if only Theresa would join them, she wouldn't have a care in the world.

When Mig's finds Fancy's bra lying around, he asks his brother if she tried to use sex to get him to agree to the trip. "Little witches - they were manipulating us!" Luis guffaws. The boys are not going to let their ladies get away with that! They grimace over the whole thing and say they're big, strong men who won't stand for behavior likes this, let alone allow themselves to be manipulated… but then they realize they should just keep their mouths shut and make their women see through all their sexual promises about the trip. They knock fists over what a great trip it's going to be, before joining the ladies for champagne. Fancy toasts to, "seeing the world with the Lopez Fitzgeralds," but Pilar can't manage a smile, still stuck on Theresa's refusal to join them.

Kay comes home to find Tabby packing and assumes she's finally redecorating. Tabby ignores Kay's insults on her dated tastes and announces she's sold her house. With The Book of Disaster forecasting ruin, Tabby shrugs, "I am getting out while the getting is good." Kay is sure they could conjure up some protection spells with Endora. Tabby sniffs about Miguel's no magic rule, but Kay insists it's an emergency. Tabby then reveals she and Endora have done their best, but no spells are working. When Kay says the evil isn't coming for Tabby, Tabby reveals her tarot reading said, "Death will soon be coming through my door." As if called by the cards, evil Jua-melia (Juanita in disguise as Amelia) enters with groceries. After introductions, Kay marvels at what the town will think when they hear of Tabby's move. "Next thing you know, pigs will fly!" she gasps. Tabby tells her that already happened - today at the Morrison Ranch! Jua-melia says she was also surprised by the sale, but pleased when Tabby agreed. Jua-melia realizes Kay is Mig's fiancée and makes one of her typically odd references to how excited she is to meet the entire LP family. When Jua-melia excuses herself, an emotional Kay asks Tabby to explain. She insists she has to protect Endora from the coming evil and then has an idea for their first stop. She gets right on the phone to call Nurse Precious, who goes ape over the news that Tabby's moving and hopes Tabby plans on bringing Luis with her for a visit. Tabby laughs that he won't be joining, but can be found posing nude in the fireman's calendar, which she promises to bring. When Tabby hangs up, she tells Kay to write her care of Nurse Precious, "If the Harmony post office is still standing."

Jua-melia returns and asks Kay about her wedding, but Kay is too wrapped up in Tabby's news to bite. She goes on about Tabby being an institution in Harmony, "Like the banks, the Cranes or the loony bin." When she asks Jua-melia for some time alone with Tabby, Tabby reminds her how "effusive" her mother used to be over newcomers. Kay throws Jua-melia a half-assed welcome over her shoulder and then the newcomer heads upstairs, where she plans on searching Kay and Mig's room so she can better prepare to kill them. Kay asks Tabby who this woman is, but all Tabby sees is the cash. Kay can't believe Tabby can leave, but Tabs insists she has no choice and adds that Kay must leave too. As Kay reveals she, Migs and Maria are going on an extended trip soon, Jua-melia returns to listen in. Kay continues that they're moving up the wedding date, which means Jua-melia must also move up her murderous plans. As Tabby and Kay continue chatting about the future, the residents of the basement start making their exit, including the skeleton and old ghoul who baby sit Maria. Kay notes that by selling her house, Tabby is kicking out all her boarders and "displacing all these creatures." Creature Charlie says they had fun while it lasted and before they leave, Tabby reminisces with her friends over their 400 year history together. After they leave, Tabby admits she feels guilty about leaving, but would feel worse if she stayed and they all died. "Get your head out of the sand, Kay!" Tabby orders.

When Jua-melia returns, Kay apologizes for being rude earlier. Jua-melia empathizes with the difficulty of a big change, chuckling to herself about the bigger one coming: "Death for everyone Pilar loves!"

June 10, 2008
Keep Acting Like the Loser, You Might Just Become One

Miguel is as shocked as Kay was to hear Tabby is moving away, which Tabby finds amusing. He can't imagine what Harmony will be without her, but she just shrugs he'll have to adjust. When he asks about the buyer, Juanita saunters in and introduces herself (as Amelia). Miguel feels she looks familiar, but Jua-melia would remember a hunk like him. After she congratulates him on his upcoming marriage, he realizes how he knows her. She turns and pulls her gun out, as she asks him how. He thinks she was the lady in the dunking booth at a fair, so she slips the gun back in her bag and laughs that she's not from town, let alone a good enough sport for the dunking booth. He welcomes her to Harmony and then turns his attention back to Tabby. Jua-melia is relieved she didn't have to kill him, since she wants to get the whole family together. Kay continues her efforts to convince Tabby not to move, but then The Book flashes, proving Harmony will soon be vaporized. Kay is relieved she'll be off traveling with Pilar and family, which Jua-melia looks close enough to hear.

When Kay goes up to put the kids down, Jua-melia talks Miguel up. He rehashes his history with Kay, from friendship to child to love and up to their impending nuptials. Then he asks if she has children. Bad question! She says they were taken from her and he suggests she talk with his mom, who has seen similar loss in Antonio and Theresa. "For a mother to lose a child, that must be devastating," he empathizes, while Jua-melia plots to kill Maria before his eyes. Kay hasn't let up on convincing Tabby, but Tabby again swears she and Endora tried every spell they've got. "I just wish I knew what the threat was," Kay grumbles and The Book of Disaster flips open and glows red. Kay can't make anything out, but Tabby sees something and then turns to look at Jua-melia and Migs. Ignoring Kay's demand for explanation, she walks over and tells Migs, "We have to talk." Jua-melia fingers her bag and pulls out her gun at being asked to step aside, but then Tabby just asks if it's true Luis knocked up another Crane. Migs shrugs that Pretty's pregnancy is old news and Jua-melia reminds Tabby she already told her about it, anyway. Migs is not glad to hear she was gossiping, but it does get Jua-melia to put her gun away again. They rehash how Alistair forced Luis to knock up Pretty, which leads Kay to tell Jua-melia there's only one person who may be worse than Alistair. "Pilar's nemesis from Mexico, Juanita," she sighs. Needless to say, Jua-melia's interests are peaked. Migs tells her about the "obsessed madwoman" with a "serious vendetta" against Pilar who may be closing in on them. Kay chimes in with news that the whole family is about to go on the run. "Danger is closer than you think," Jua-melia thinks menacingly. Then she chides Migs to not be flippant about his mother's concerns. He agrees Juanita may be dangerous, but calls his mother "obsessed". That reminds Kay they have to move up the wedding. They assume the others involved – Paloma and Noah, Gwen and Ethan - will be alright with the idea. Jua-melia reports back to her nemesis, thrilled about this major wedding. "This wedding is the key to me getting the most spectacular revenge possible," she whispers before returning to the group to rave about the thought of a triple wedding. The more Kay and Migs say about the "family affair", the more Jua-melia likes it! Tabby, for her part, just wonders why she got a warning flash about Migs and Jua-melia. She opens The Book and it shows a three tier wedding cake in flames. We've been getting lots of signs about weddings recently," she notes. "Looks like this wedding's going to be a real disaster."

Gwen returns from the shower to find the living room all cleaned up and everyone gone. She calls for Little E, but her mother comes in instead, nursing an evening hang over. Gwen immediately vents about Little E's prank, rehashing how the kid showed a slideshow that was all about Theresa and Ethan… with just a little bit of Gwen at the end. She's sure she fell right into Little E's trap by getting angry and then looking the bitch. Her mother agrees, but calls the talk a "whine fest." She tells Gwen it's her job to win Ethan back, but Gwen says as hard as she loves Ethan, all she gets from him is "kindness." Beccs fixes drinks and tells Gwen to get real, since Ethan is giving and will continue to give exactly what he's promised and she's the one with her "heart set on a man who's in love with another woman." Gwen feels like Theresa is still coming between them, so her mom says to get on her knees and pray thanks that Theresa is dead. She tells her daughter to stop fighting for what's already hers. "Act like the winner," she snipes. "Honey, if you keep acting like the loser, you might just become one!" Gwen snipes that all her mother does is jump stable boys and lecture her. Her mom simply counters that she can't keep being insecure or, "A whole new Theresa's going to walk into his life." Gwen calms from her "tantrum". She can't shake the feeling there's still a war going on, but believes once they get past the ceremony, all will be well. Of course, she's just as sure Little E will try to ruin it. She gets worked up about her perfect day, which eventually leads back to "if Theresa is alive…" Her mom says to change the channel and toasts to exorcizing whatever it left of Theresa.

Ethan is up in the attic, going through a box of Theresa's things while Gert-resa spies on him. He chuckles to himself over her Crane industries pictures and talks to her photo, missing her and remembering how good it was, which Gert-resa sees as mourning. She again vows to stop the ceremony, while Ethan talks about hiding his pain from Gwen. "It's not fair for me to burden her with my grief," he says, hoping Theresa understands why he's marrying Gwen. He's sure she'll be good to the kids, to which Gert-resa mutters, "She just treated Little Ethan like dirt!" He aches to have her with him, but she can't tell him she is. After giggling over Gwen's accident with the table cloth, he goes on about how Theresa could always laugh at herself and remembers, "We always had the best of times together." Gert-resa whispers that she still believes in fate, even if being this close is so hard it's killing her. Then Ethan goes through the box, searching for a keepsake for Little E, but instead he finds her diary. He's not sure he should read it. Gert-resa hopes he will. He does. He reads about their infamous first run in at the Harmony carnival and her dreams of happily ever after, and can't help but wish she were with him. Then he reads the entry of their romantic evening in a house by the beach, while she recounts it by memory and the memory plays out until they kissed. "Now I know what heaven's like," she'd written. A teary Ethan begs for a sign from her that he's doing the right thing. Then he reads another entry, about the time he said he loved her and Theresa takes it over again. "He treats me like such a lady," she'd written, going on to rave about the way he treats her, hoping she can measure up and how wonderful he is. "I give you my heart for all eternity," he reads and then tells her he gave his heart to her too and to never let it go. He thanks her for the diary. "It's truly a comfort knowing that it's here whenever I want to see you," he sighs, leaving it on the arm of the chair for next time. Gert-resa is relieved the diary doesn't have any of her big secrets in it, but then she realizes the diary is the place to plant his "sign". When Ethan finds Little E's peanut drawing, he sings the peanut song, with Gert-resa filling in the gaps. "Even then, I felt like Little E was my son," he sighs. He laughs that she's a packrat as he finds a menu with a flower tucked in it. Meanwhile, Gert-resa is composing a letter that concludes, "If by chance I should die before you, remember our love is eternal. It sounds selfish, but please don't remarry. Trust in our love, because I will return to you, I swear. Our love will break the bonds of death and I will come back to you." She wonders if it's too much, but then decides that it's perfect and plants the letter, almost getting spotted by Ethan. He doesn't see her, but he notices she's put the book back in the wrong place. Inside, he finds an envelope with his name on it. "This wasn't here before, was it?" he wonders.

June 11, 2008
A Quad Couple Super Ceremony

Pilar calls Pretty and Sheridan together for a meeting at the cottage to tell them about the family vacation in Theresa's memory, which both Luis and Fancy are going on. The girls need Luis – for Marty and Pretty's fake fetus of course – which is why Pilar asks them to come. She as much as demands it, sparking their curiosity, so she reveals their lives are in danger and tells them to start making arrangements. They are convinced. When she leaves, Sheridan tells Pretty they should trust Pilar's warnings, but Pretty is more concerned with the fact that Fancy is going. Before heading out to check in with Luis and Fancy, the girls start posturing over which of them is really meant to be with him.

At the manse, Luis helps Fancy get packed up. He's still not comfortable with the decision to run and Fancy empathizes that he and his brother are fighting their fighter's instincts. He hopes he doesn't slip up and tell his mom he knows about Juanita. His anger over Juanita is growing and he doesn't like giving up without a fight. "It's hard," he says, which she turns into a double entendre. She moves in to solve his "big problem" with a role in the hay. They are both winded and naked from a session when Pilar knocks on the door later. After Fancy throws something over herself and the saddle set up in the middle of the room, Pilar reveals Pretty and Sheridan are in for the trip. Then Luis reveals he knows about Juanita, claiming he did some cop work to find out the truth. Pilar isn't sure she believes him, but does admit Juanita is coming and insists they must leave. Then she reveals she's hoping they'll join in the big wedding, which Luis calls "a quad couple super ceremony". Teasing aside, he and Fancy are in, which is just what Sheridan and Pretty arrive to hear. The girls, both dressed in green, are crushed when Luis suggests they call the big family trip a honeymoon. Sheridan tells Pretty to pretend she's happy, but Pretty is not hearing that, let alone wedding bells for Fancy. "Luis will marry me," she says.

Migs and Kay meet with Paloma and Noah at the manse and tell them about the big family trip around the world, which means pushing up the wedding date. Noah figures that's great, but wonders why the rush. Kay just says it's what Pilar wants, so Noah reminds them he's about to start med school, which means he can't just run off. With Vincent and Alistair's murderer on the loose, Paloma can't leave either. Migs says someone can cover and the couple keeps pushing, "no time like the present." Noah and Paloma aren't sold, so Kay tells them Pilar is certain Juanita is coming to kill them all. Migs admits he and Luis want to stay and fight, which Noah likes the sound of, but Kay insists they must do as Pilar says and Migs agrees his mother needs them. Noah is worried about med school. Paloma is more concerned about her mom freaking out. For now, however, they agree to move the wedding up.

Nearby, Beccs tells her daughter to relax, offering her some batteries, but Gwen says she has Ethan for that. Her mother says batteries can still help, but then turns her talk back to Theresa, who Ethan will forget about after saying "I do" in church. Gwen is spooked, but Beccs insists Theresa can't come crawling out of the belly of the shark that ate her and to get over it. "With Theresa gone, the only thing that can become between you and Ethan is you," she warns and Gwen agrees, but still can't shake Theresa's stink. Beccs again insists not even Theresa can survive being digested by sharks and Gwen finally shakes it off, sure she'll keep Ethan as long as they get re-hitched. When they walk into the entry way, they find Migs, Kay, Noah and Paloma just wrapping up. The group asks if Gwen and Ethan would mind moving up the date. No problem there! 

Up in the attic, Ethan sits down with the letter Gert-resa planted for him and starts to read it, while Gert-resa spurs him on from her hiding spot, hoping it will convince him to wait for her return. The romantic letter says there is no greater love, he is the love of her life and she will always love him. He will always love her too, so he tears up and stops reading… before he gets to her request to never remarry! Gert-resa panics as he decides to put the letter aside for a stronger day, but to her relief, he realizes he can't leave without reading it, "No matter how much it hurts." He reads on about their unique, unstoppable love, but as he's about to read her request he not remarry, Gwen shows up. He tells her about the letter he's found and she hopes "it's not like the one conveniently insisting you not send Little Ethan or Jane off to boarding school." Instead of saying that, she tells him about everyone downstairs wanting to move up the wedding date. Ethan can't think of a reason to say no and sends her to go downstairs. She isn't about to leave him to read the letter and insists he join her. Gert-resa fears it will all be over if he doesn't finish her letter.

Downstairs, Gert-resa watches as a major four-couple wedding planning session begins in the living room. When Paloma steps out to grab her PDA, Gert-resa begs her not to move the wedding up. When she pulls off her teeth and glasses and reveals herself as Theresa. Paloma passes straight out. She comes to, only to faint again. Noah rushes to her side and asks why Paloma called the nanny Theresa. Gert-resa covers and agrees to keep an eye on Paloma while he gets some water. She shakes Paloma awake and promises to explain later. She begs her not to tell anyone and to help her stop the weddings. Paloma can't imagine how she can stop it and begs her to come on the trip and tell Ethan the truth. Their reunion is interrupted when Noah returns, relieved to find his girl on her feet.  

At the same time, Beccs tells her daughter this date change is just what she needs, but Gwen is now upset over the letter. "This is exactly what happens when you let the help read and write," Beccs grumbles. Then she orders champagne for a group, while Ethan steps aside to read Theresa's letter. Gwen asks him to read it later and after he agrees, she plots to help him lose it. As the planning commences, the letter hangs from his pocket, right in Gwen's face.

At the church, Jua-melia builds a family tree of Pilar's family on the computer as she recounts how many kills down and how many to go. Her henchman, who still can't stand her, shows up and she shows him her family killing tree, which includes "in laws and their children as well." She then explains the multiple wedding will be an opportunity for her massacre. "Their huge wedding will end up a mass funeral," she chuckles and then asks her henchman to use his explosive training to choose the best spot for a bomb in the church. He fantasizes about sticking dynamite in her mouth, but agrees. After some investigation, he shows her where to stick the bomb for "maximum carnage". The whole church may even cave in. Jua-melia plots to keep Pilar out of the blast so she can see her family wiped out.  "I have a plan, a brilliant plan, to torture my dear friend," she chuckles, imagining Pilar searching the church's rubble for survivors only to find death. "I want Pilar to be in the worst pain of her life when I kill her."


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